Lists, and listless harm.

I miss my family, and I'm sitting here, with a pad and pen, watching Friends, trying not to get distracted, but of course, I can't even sleep without getting distracted, because that is what I do lately I guess. I came up with an extensive list of things that I need to do. Actually, I came up with three extensive lists. One: short term , two: long term, and three: birthday.

They were somewhat successful, and I think being alone gives me a lot of time to think. I did a lot of research on MFA screenwriting programs, because, when it boils down to it, I think I'd rather have a day job that I can actually stand, and these programs are just so unbelievable, that I just can't help but want to apply to. If I can't get a thing going with music in the next year (which is my first goal) I'm going to end up going to get my Masters. I have to.

Lists are turning out to be a good thing, even when I put stupid things like Laundry on them. As well as appointments with various people. So far I have to make appointments with: my hairdresser, gyno, dermatologist, and my psychologist. Hm. TMI? Sorry about that.

Do I miss England you ask? A little. I miss my friends more I think. How am I going to sleep tonight? Too many questions, why can't my mind just be quiet for once.

There is something comforting about watching endless episodes of friends on my own couch. I love home. I'd never leave if I didn't have to.

Last Day

Well, its my last day here. I woke up with a kind of bittersweet feeling in my stomach, my flatmates and I made up a new word for that feeling "bum-cited." It means when youre bummed, yet excited. And that's what I am today.

Despite my feeling of bum-citedness, I'm EXcited to get up, and go out to breakfast with my roomies, then do some shopping. I think I'm either going to go into London by myself, or Kingston, get some more souvineers for people!

Class was so much fun yesterday, we didn't have it! Haha, after we handed in our final paper ::SIGH:: we went to a pub with our teacher Gregg and watched him chug a pint of Bitter in under 3 seconds! He kept his word, and he's such a funny guy. We had a blast with him and it was a great way to end the four weeks.

My class of Shakespeare girls with Gregg Eaves.

Last night was the farewell dinner, and the teachers all gave speeches thanking us for coming and stuff, it was really cute, then they handed out prizes to people from the photo competition held on the first day, then we went home. It was good food and good fun. But I'm more than ready to come home :( can't wait to head to the airport tomorrow, but I'm going to really enjoy this last day. I'll miss the experience. Hopefully you guys will enjoy my videos when I get home. I'll make a bunch.

Its funny to look back over this last month and realize all that's happened, all the friends I've made, the habits I've gotten used to. Its going to be wierd to drive a car again, and stop drinking diet coke again! Nevertheless I'm going to get used to it, and I'm going to be so thankful to arrive in Newark and have someone ask me "How YOU doin!" It will be so refreshing to not have to ask for a "soya latte" and pay in "pounds." It will be nice to be able to Sit at a restaurant and get SERVED instead of walking up to the bar and ordering food. I'm going to see all my Ambassador friends when I go back to work, and it's going to be so great. I can't believe this experience is over. Its bittersweet, and again, I'm bumcited, but I'll be a happy camper to be able to sleep in my bed again, and go set up my new apartment with Emmy. I can't wait. Ah! only one more day!

Found a Pigeon in my Kitchen! And its Poop :(

Just got my departure information in an e-mail! Oh wow. I'm kinda sad!

I'm leaving at on Saturday at 12:00 for Heathrow with 4 other kids. I dont think any of them are on my plane, but at least I won't be traveling to the airport alone. I haven't written for the past 5 ish days only because I've been doing so much stuff!!! I don't want to forget anything I've done so I'll try to summarize from the last time I wrote.

Good news! They picked my essay to go into the newsletter! So I'll try to get my hands on a few of them before I get home.

I'll start with:
Weds, July 22nd- I went to the Victoria and Albert Museum with Jenna and Amber. This museum was unbelievably amazing. I wanted to stay in it all day long, and I couldn't believe we had to leave in about 2 hours. The girls had to get back to class, but it was such an amazing museum. It was a HUGE compilation of things spanning centuries. Like portraits, fabrics, statues, tools, JEWELERY! the Jewelery section was by far the most impressive and interesting part. It was halls and halls of elaborate jewelery from every century from Lords and Ladies to the common person's Jewelery. Mom would have loved it. Anyway, Amber and Jenna left for class and I decided to stay in Knightsbridge and do a little bit more shopping. I got some souvineers for Julie and Dana, and bought myself a small suitcase from London Luggage Co.

Thurs, July 23rd- I went into Stratford again, but this time with my Shakespeare class. This time was a lot more intimate than last time, and my teacher Gregg bought along his lovely wife Julia, who was the sweetest woman. By the end of the day we were calling them mom and dad. It was really funny. They knew so much history about it, the two of them wouldn't stop talking all day. But I learned a LOT. It was a great trip and I really bonded with my girls from the class. They're all really great. We went into this church that was really extremely old, like from the 13th century, and there were remnants of a painting that had been scraped off and plastered over during the Protestant Refromation, which was very rare, because they didn't like to have paintings on the walls of churches once King Henry VIII became king, becuas they thought it distracted from the worship. Gregg told us that remnants of paintings like this were extremely rare. And this old church in stratford had it on the wall. It was actually really cool to see what would have been there before they took it down. Here is a small pic of what it looked like.

Someone actually scraped off the plaster that was put over it to try and restore what used to be there. Really cool, huh? After that we saw an amazing production of The Winter's Tale at the Royal Shakespeare Company, which is the official Shakespeare playhouse in Stratford. It was amazing. The girls and I stayed in for a little bit and had a few drinks before the long train ride back to London, Waterloo.
Fri, July 24th- Had to leave 9am for Paris. It was a long journey. We took the Eurostar which was a hella trip for my eardrums. I felt all stuffed up and clogged. Not fun. But I got another stamp on my passport! After we got into Paris, we took a bus tour of the main attractions which took about 2 and a half hours. (They didn't even give us a breather! we still had our luggage with us!) It was great, and beautiful, but after such a long day of traveling, we all wanted to get back to the hotel and venture out by ourselves!

Once we settled into the hotel then ventured out for something to eat, and I desperatley wanted wine! We went to this cute cafe that we found a few blocks down from the Bastille (where we were staying) and had dinner. After that, we went to the Eiffel tower and relaxed for a long time out in the field! We watched the lights twinkle and had so much fun! Then bedime.
Sat, July 25th- Another walking tour of Paris, covered in video that I'm gonna put together! We saw Notre Dame and walked through it. It was beautiful, and larger than life.

Sun, July 26th- We went to the Louvre in the morning, which I also have a lot of videos of so I won't talk that much about it. It was beautiful, but we didn't get much time in there as we should have. Then, another walking tour! But this time, of Monmarte, a little village alllllll the way on the tippy top of paris. It was so cute up there, and they film movies there all of the time. Got a yummmy Banana and Nutella crepe and saw the Moulin Rouge!
Then I came back, (I skipped Monday becuase it was just traveling all day) and I've been working on this stinky paper all day long! I want it to be over, but It just won't quit! Tomorrow I'm meeting with my class at the pub, I don't think we'll be doing much Shakespeare talk. We've really bonded, and our teacher is really fun. Its the last day of classes for me tomorrow so i'm really excited that I knocked 3 credits out of the way and had so much fun doing it! I'll write more later becuase my hands are tired!! Ah! I miss you all!

Tips

This is a short essay I wrote and entered to be published in the next Kingston Summer school Newsletter based on some of the things I've learned here so far.

Hot Tips for Future Summer School Students

Before I start rattling off tips for your future stay at Kingston University, let me tell you this: I have never traveled to Europe before this experience, and although I knew things were going to be completely different, I don’t think I really could even comprehend how different they were going to be. I wish I could have read something giving me good, specific tips before I left. First thing’s first—don’t be alarmed when you open your mouth to speak and people look at you like you have just belched Budweiser in their faces.
In London it’s not such a big deal to be un-British, but in the small town of Surbiton, where there aren’t many Americans, they will know you are a student. But don’t be taken aback by this feeling of being outsider, it will pass and you should embrace it. Maybe these tips will help.
• Be nice to everyone, and try to take public transportation (bus, train, tube) as much as possible to get really, thoroughly used to it.
• Study the tube maps! I can’t stress that enough. They are easy, and you will learn them if you just look over them once a day. Knowing which line goes where really helps you to blend in with the swarming crowds—you don’t want to be left behind staring at a tube map in the station, especially if you venture into London alone.
• Do what you want to do. Go to the main tourist attractions at least once, but if you can help it, try not to go places where you have no desire to be. This is your time; you’ll want to take as much time doing the things you want as possible. You will enjoy the day much more than going to a random museum and spending ten pounds. Do things that inspire you.
• Don’t let yourself be affected by jetlag. You can help this. Set your phones, clocks and computer’s times to London time as soon as you get there, and follow that. Try not to think about “what time it is at home” because you will just be haunted by images of you sleeping comfortably in your bed at home, which will induce homesickness.
• Get plenty of rest. With summer school, the classes take you on trips at least once a week per class, so that is at least two all day trips per week, most of the time more. Even the weekends are filled up with side trips.
• If you want to go to the pubs, that’s a great idea—but do not stay out into all hours of the night. In London, the trains and tubes stop running at a quarter to midnight, so that is good enough initiative to start “pubbing” early, and get back on the train by before midnight. It might sound lame, but when you’ve had your fun and are back in bed at a reasonable hour, you will be thanking me in the morning.
• Weather is extremely unpredictable. Extremely. You will need these three things at all times when you are in London in the summer: an umbrella, a sweater/light jacket, and sunglasses. I kid you not, these three extremes can and WILL happen when you are out for a day. Even if the sky looks like a Sandals Resort commercial, rain is coming. And you WILL get soaked.
• This might sound unimportant, but bring a change purse, or at least a wallet with a compartment for coins; there are eight types here. This is extremely difficult to deal with when there is nowhere to put them. Fishing for coins, paired with your American accent is a recipe for feeling severely out casted.

Alton, Stratford and Bath

Right now I'm compiling a video about my time at these three places where I saw the Jane Austen House museum in Chawton, then Shakespeare's Birthplace in Stratford upon Avon, and Bath, which was just an incredible, historic city. They were all unbelievable. I'm sorry I haven't updated in so long, it was just so crazy and I'm trying to pack everything I want to do in this LAST WEEK that I'm here. I'm going into London again today to visit the British Library and the Victoria and Albert museum which has really cool Victorian era stuff, I could look at those things all day!!

I really miss home and can't wait to be back in NJ, but for this last week, i'm just going to keep going out and having fun, then PARIS this weekend, which should be awesome as well. I'll post the video when I'm done with it, then everyone can see the places I've been!

Lord Chamberlain's Men

Yesterday I had quite an exhausting day! I went all over the Inns of court, which were extremely cool, our teacher Gregg showed us around all of the old Inns that all the people in the Elizabethan era stayed when they were going to see the queen. It was so cool. They were among the oldest Elizabethan buildings in London. They were amazing.

My favorite was the room in Gray's Inn where Shakespeare's company first performed 12th night. Ever. The room was exactly the same as it was back then, and i swear, I felt the energy! It was unbelievable to know that THAT was the place that Twelfth night was first played. I saw it recently at the Pearl Theater in NY with Anthony, and it was such an amazing play. I can't believe I was there. How beautiful is that, can't you just see the ghosts of Shakespeare's company! So weird, right It was unbelievable to be there.

After walking for around three hours (UGHH) me and Jessie wanted to catch a tube to Westminster Abbey to go to Evensong. Its basically a short evening mass with an amazing choir. And, the best part-- free admission into Westminster Abbey. So, we got there and we actually got to go INSIDE!! It was unbelievably breathtaking. Accompanied by the choir singing in Latin, it was just heavenly. So spiritual. And plus we were so tired from walking, there was nowhere I'd rather sit and relax.

After that, me and Jessie went back to Waterloo and got ourselves a little picnic in Marks and Spencer, we got all sorts of goodies, a mini bottle of wine, and we sat on a bench by the Thames on the Southbank of London and ate and talked about Literature (she's an English major too) We had such a great time, I'd say that had to be one of my favorite parts of the night, especially after you hear what happened next!

Now, this is a disclaimer regarding Troilus and Cressida: it is possibly the most pointless, confusing works of art Shakespeare ever created. Underdeveloped characters, unresolved conflict, no hero, no heroine, no basic plot, nothing stronger than appetite imagery and disease imagery. Intolerable.

We attempted to see this at the globe last night... unfortunatley it wasn't as half as successful as the first one. As you might know, the ceiling is open in like an arena type thing, so it lets the sunlight in. Also, it lets the bad things in, like RAIN. And you could guess on a blustery night, what happened during the performance of Shakespeare's worst play ever written ( Sorry Bill) it rained!!! Ughh, me and Jessie ran at intermission into the gift shop. We were miserable, without a coat, we had an umbrella but we werent allowed to have them in the theater. For obvious reasons. Anyway, regretfully (not really) we left and caught a 10:00 train. It would have run so much longer had we stayed, and we were soaked and exhausted for walking for close to 4 hours... UGHHH! So we were ultimatley happy with our decision. :(

More pics of the Inns of Court

Time is like a fashionable host...

...that slightly shakes his parting guest by th'hand
and, with his arms outstretched as he would fly,
grasps in the comer: welcome ever smiles,
and farewell goes out sighing.

I got my Shakespeare to keep me company at least. That's from Troilus and Cressida, I read the entire thing in the library between my classes, took me 2 hrs. Haha. At least I got it over with.

Today is going to be a solemn day, only because my roommates are out on a trip, and I do not have anything to do, thank god. Except write my paper, which shouldn't be too bad. I'm so tired. I'm just going to go to a cafe and write it. But not before I go for a run on the queen's promenade..I hope it doesn't rain :/ it looks like it's going to. I better get going.

Yesterday was a good day too, relaxing. We examined the theme of love in a midsummer night's dream and compared it with that of Troilus and Cressida. So I've been thinking about that a lot lately. But otherwise, I just did laundry and stuff. I got to talk to mom on Skype so that was good. I was a little homesick, and I apologize for that, but I will be better I promise, and everything will be okay. Here's another quote from the ever so "false" Cressida.

Cressida:
Blind fear, that seeing reason leads, finds
safer footing than blind reason stumbling without fear:
to fear the worst oft cures the worse.

Sigh. Now it looks so terrible out, maybe I'll stay in for a little and see if it clears up.

Oh, a Bonnie Lass in Edinburgh

This photo is NOT touched up, I repeat, NOT touched up. Gorgeous.

That is seriously what the scenery looked like out the window of my bus. It was gorgeous and unbelievable. If I were to tell you every single thing we did, it would take me about ten pages. This weekend was so long, and fast, and slow, and grueling and fun all at the same time. Interesting. First off, I think Scotland takes the cake for the most beautiful place I've ever been outside of the states (my all time favorite, Sedona) It is so beautiful, it makes you feel so small, like you want to take back any selfish thought you've ever had in your life. Standing out on the foothills of the "three sisters" mountains (Below) with my tour guide Mike, he told me that it took him eleven hours to hike up the center hill and back down. By foot. Now, THAT'S more adventurous. I almost got emotional how symbolic and beautifully colorful the scenery was.
Edinburgh was another story. Equally as cool, only totally different place. It was so much quieter than London, and the city was smaller, and had SO MUCH history that Mike told us all about. He was so informative, gave so many stories, and everything he really did an amazing job giving us the full effect of Scotland. Anyway, here's a picture of Edinburgh, a bit of the archetecture that I found so appealing. This is a view from the Edinburgh castle, which was kind of boring because it was made into a museum instead of keeping it old like it should have been, but it had great views, here is one from the top. Such a cool city. The cafe where JK Rowling wrote Harry Potter was in Edinburgh, and my friends who were fans took pictures of it. There was a lot to do there, and me Jenna Kiki and Amber went out and had drinks and dinner at a place in town, then went bar hoppin' for a little while. Such an amazing town, still can't believe I already came and went!!

But I'd have to say, my favorite place besides the Highlands of Scotland was Blair Castle. It was an extremely old castle where all the Scottish monarchy had lived over the centuries. (The Dukes of Atholl to be specific) It was so beautiful, everything was so well preserved and it was straight out of a movie. Beautiful rooms with engraved celings, the dinnerware, the jewlery, the portraits, the couches, furniture, hairbrushes, clothes, guns and crown jewels, everything was from the 17-1800's and as you guys know, that is my absolutley favorite time period. It was unreal to see these things right in front of me that were used in the time that I've always read about. It was just so breathtaking.
So as i trapsed slowly around the castle, marveling over every small pocket portrait or trying to match the gems in the case with the gems the women wore in the portraits, my friends were kind of breezing through, so I felt kind of bad and found myself sort of rushing through rooms where I could have spent plenty more time in. I want to find more of these kinds of things in england. This was just an unbelievable experience for me. I even saw the oldest preserved 17th century bathroom!!! it was so cool, the bathtub was beautiful and there was CARPET in there! no pictures allowed inside though, :( but I did find this one on the internet of my favorite room just to give you an idea. Here's the website incase you want to see more. These are all real and used by the scottish aristocrats. So cool. Queen Victoria vacationed here every summer too, we saw the room she stayed in and handwritten letters by her thanking them for her beautiful stay. I could go on and on with this all night, but it might bore some of you!

Anyway, to wrap up-- I saw the Loch Ness! What a cool lake, so mysterious, there were so many things about "Nessie" around, its the biggest tourist trap ever, but I didn't fall for it! I just loved how dark the water is. Another cool thing-- I saw the Atlantic ocean from the other side!!! Weird, huh?? I'll write a lot more tomorrow I'm just so exhausted! I've been reading all of your comments (Basically just Tara, Hi Taraaa!!) and am so happy you're following me on my journey! I sware, this week will be slower, i'm trying to take it easy a little after this weekend, and not feeling so hot... so I'll have a lot more time to write! I'm going to try to catch up on my True Blood and crawl up in bed with my computer! Goodnight!
I sware-- I don't have a little "Capitan" in me haha..

So I paid for my internet access in the hostel...

and i only have 8 minutes left... real quick update for those of you following. Scotland is fabulous. I can't believe how incredible this country is, and furthermore, how I never knew this existed. I am so engulfed in the culture, its so cool out here, much more calm and relaxing than london. The archetecture in Edinborough is unbelievable, dating back so far as to the 1200's. We had an incredible tour guide, Mike, kilt and all, reminded me of a scottish Cousin Dave with long hair. He was so cool, knew so many stories about everywhere we went. We went from Edinborough (Lowlands and city) to Inverness, which is in the Highlands. I've never seen anything like it and I can't WAIT to upload my photos. It was so unreal, I need to come back here. I'm not feeling too good right now, that is why i'm here in my hostel on the computer instead of out on the town with the girls. I'm very dissapointed, but I needed to just relax and put my feet up. The time of the month came on the truly WRONG time of the month, the only night i'm going to be in Edinborough. Mrs fox would be super proud that I actually went picking Heather on the Hill today in the Highlands of Scotland. I keep thinking about her, and the Happy Pumpkin but thats besides the point! Times almost up so let me wrap up. Its so beautiful out here, and we're heading back tomorrow around 2 so I'll be back in london around 6. Ill upload my pictures then and write much more about what i did, and the incredible 18th century palace I saw today (I felt like i was in a Jane Austen novel!) I still have to write about the globe too! AHH!!!! love you all byeee!

GLOBE TONIGHT

I can't even begin to describe my experience at the globe tonight, magical doesn't even cut it. I can't remember a time where I was actually THAT happy. I can't write about it right now, becuase I just got back its 12 am and I still have to pack for a trip that I have to get up at 5 am for. I'll be leaving at 6 am for Scotland so I probably won't be able to make many phone calls there without roaming. I am not going to be at my computer so I will be out of commission, I'll write about it tomorrow morning if i have a second. But i will post pictures and more details as i have the time! I've been SOOOO BUSY i'm so sorry if i havent been good at keeping contact with anyone! I love you all and miss you so much.

Crazy day!

Wow, what a crazy day. I went into London all by myself today! It was great! I got up at like 10, showered and headed off to Surbiton to catch the train. On the way (its about a 15 minute walk) I got starbucks, it might have been the most delicious "soya" Latte I've had in a while! It was so cool, because they ask you if you want it "take away" or if you're staying, and if you're staying they give it to you in a cute ceramic mug instead of a paper cup! That was yummy. I thought of something new I'm going to add to my blog everyday.. a list. Of things that I miss in the U.S. and/or things i'm going to have to get used to not having in the UK. So here goes :

The list of things that I miss in the U.S.
and/or what i'm going to have to get used to not having in the UK:

1. self check-out lines in the supermarket
   
2. public toilets that you can flush with your foot
3. having a car
4. predictable weather
5. iced coffee (they don't make it really well)
6. people understanding what I'm saying
7. the 1 dollar bill/ lightweight change
8. not having sore feet
   

That seems like enough bitching for one day, right? Things that I do not miss: not being able to buy alcohol! Yipee! Anyway, I went to the surbiton train station and caught the Waterloo train, once I got in, i took the tube to Green Park, then changed to go to Knightsbridge. That is the street that Harrods is on.. so you can only GUESS what I did today! It was so unbelievable. Harrods is unreal. It's like a palace full of designer clothes. I bought little things for the fam and explored for a few hours. It was unreal. I am so tired that I cant even write. I pooped myself out today-- let me make a note of that.

I also went to Harvey Nichols, I need to talk about that, it was unbelievable. Poop. i'm tired. zzzzzz

It's raining.

I don't know if I should go all the way into London or stay here for a while... I guess we can always see. It's still early...

I'll update more later.

(Me and Liz) hahaa

I slept till noon again!

Jenna, Kirsten, Me and Amber In front of the Wellington Arch!

And.. this is the second time I slept till noon on this trip. I only let this happen because it is Sunday. Yesterday might have been the most fun I've had here yet, but then again, I keep saying that!
In the morning, my flatmates and I had breakfast, I made weird eggs (you know they don't refrigerate eggs here!??) I like them though, because they are farm raised, they still have dirt on them (ew a little but then also I kind of like that). Well anyway I ate them, and it was really good, because i bought this cheese that looked like it was really popular, everyone was buying it. Its shredded.. its delicious. I'm pretty sure its Grier.
A note on food for mom: everyone is so vegetarian concisious over here, i never thought it would be like that. Every place I've been to foodshop has little green V's on everything that is vegetarian. It's awesome. Even on the backs of containers or chip bags it will say "suitable for vegetarians" so i've been having a pretty easy time and no one thinks I'm weird. Yet. I've been eating a lot of fruit and veggies, drinking my soy, and eating eggs, so I'm good with the protien.

Blah, boring right? Anyway, reading Uncle Mike's comment just gave me the final push to buy the new Wilco cd. I've been holding off becuase I want to spend my money on other things here, but what's 9.99 on itunes gonna hurt me! and plus Anthony has been raving about it back home. I did it! I'm about to listen to it. And to answer Uncle Mike's question- I have A ghost is born, summerteeth, and sky blue sky, and they are currently on the most played out of all of my music in my ipod. So soothing, i can write while listening to them, sleep, think, they're great. Love them so much, and can't wait to hear this new album. Any others that you reccomend? I know they have tons of albums.

So. Yesterday. we went into London again, went to the Covet Gardens which is like a little center of town/marketplace, it has so many shops and stores, its adorable. We stopped at Pret At Manger for lunch, it was reccomended to me by my shakespeare teacher--think Au Bon Pain in New York, in regards to the frequency in the city. Anyway its fast and DELICIOUS and only about 4 pounds for a sandwitch and drink. You go in, pick your sandwich from an awesome display case, and whatever else you want. Everything is so cutely packaged! I want to go back there. I got the most delicious veggie sandwich, mom would have loved it, Olives, sundries, lots of lettuce, red peppers, avocados. So good and fresh. Anyway. We wantered around a bit, then took the tube to Hyde park. We sat underneath a beautiful tree to take a load off for a few minutes. A few minutes later, a bird shat all over my back. Yep. That's my flatmate Amber gettins the crap off my back with a card we got handed earlier. Lovely. So after that, we decided to go home and I had to sit on 2 tubes and the train ride home with poop all over my back. Note the face.

We got home and ate our salads again, then got ready to go out. We went to a pub called The Ram which is right on the Thames river in Kingston, about a 15 minute walk. We walked and it was a beautiful night. It was so much fun, we got there around 9, and the pubs close at 11!!! so we had only a few drinks and headed home. It was great though, to walk along the thames river at night with my friends. Don't worry about safety because the night life is unbelievable. At that bar there had to be 200 people on the outside patio, all my age or a little older. Its so crazy! we liked it because it was obviously something people do around there, so we felt like one of the locals, although we didn't sound like one. It was a great day, and I'm really tuckered out from it. A lot of walking. okay sorry this was so long! I hadn't written in a few days. Love you all!


P.s. BODDINGTONS!!!! if anyone knows the show Friends, when they went to London for Ross's wedding, they kept talking about how they drank Boddingtons. I had to buy them.

Gimmie a Break.

Oh yeah, I forgot to tell Mom that I tried the Kit-Kats over here that Donna recommended. They were delicious, super creamy and crunchy. I don't usually buy candy, and I haven't been very accustomed to Kit-Kats in the Us anyway, but they were damn good. I wish i could take one home for my mom, but it would definitely wreck my suitcase.
I have to read two more of the Bard's plays for my class, so here's a line from Trolius and Cressida that I liked:

I have, as when the sun doth light askance,
Buried this sigh in wrinkle of a smile.
But sorrow that is couched in seeming gladness
Is like that mirth fate turns to sudden sadness.

Not to depress you or anything.

First Day of Class

Me and the flatmates on the train, trying to win the picture contest.
This was our best attempt. Sad huh?

And I think that's a sign of rain... not sure. Either way, I had a very very fun day today. I had my Shakespeare class, and my teacher seems really really cool. The girls in it seem very nice, (there are no boys) and I think we're going to have fun in the class. As a fellow New Yorker and a girl also named Amanda said the teacher will probably let us "get away with f*cking murder" sorry mom. But that's what she said, and it oddly made me feel more at home. I've been realizing now that I'm friends with people from Michigan, and Georgia, that cursing and swearing is an awful big part of my vocabulary. I've been toning it down due to the politeness of their character, but I find it comforting when people I've met from the east coast still stay stuff like "mad chill." For some reason, I miss that.

I've been tending to hang out with the kids from the Midwest for some reason, i think it is becuase their demeanors are more relaxed and a lot calmer, sort of more like me. A bunch of kids were going to this club in the center of Kingston called oceana which has quite a reputation for being the most "hopping club in all of Kingston" it apparently has several rooms, and each plays different music. That's a little too much for me. So me, James, Jenna and Kirsten decided not to go, we just hung out. Our other flatmate Amber got all dolled up though, and went out with some girls downstairs.

Either way, the class was a fun class, we ended the day with going to the gas station and just hanging out in our kitchen with my flatmates and Kirsten (She doesn't live in our flat but we've adopted her) haha.. she's so sweet, and we're all from different parts of the country, so we've been analyzing each other's accents and talking about what's different in our parts of the world. Tomorrow, we're going to go into London again, and i'm DETERMINED to find a cute little coffee shop to sit at and sip espresso!!!! I will take pictures, promise. To make a long story short, I'm meeting some really nice people, and finding my own little niche here. Even after three days i'm getting really accustomed to the area, which is good. I really miss you guys, whoever reads this, mom, dad, anthony, emmy, I miss you guys a lot. I can't wait to see you when I get home, and I wish you could be here. I can't wait to see shows at the Globe and everything, thats next thursday!!! i'm psyched.

I'll leave you guys with my dream house that I saw in London yesterday, it's in the park right before you get to Buckingham palace. It's adorable and so beautiful. Here you are! How pretty.
Love you!

Today I got stuck between the doors of the London underground.

Just picture a subway closing and you being between the doors. You think I'm kidding? Well, that was just ONE part of this extremely long and sweaty day.

I woke up, calm and collected at 7, to get ready for the long day ahead, made sure I drank plenty of water so I wouldn't have to worry about being super-dehydrated later on, and headed off to the orientation with my "flatmates" (that's what everyone calls them) Once we got to the main campus of Kingston, we filled out paperwork, learned how to use our phones more, and actually got our "oyster passes" which let us ride the train zones 1-6, buses, and the tube, absolutley free! So it's a breeze to go through London, because you don't have to even think about buying a ticket anywhere, just hop on.

We went for another walking tour of downtown Kingston this time, and it was surreal. It was a mini-city all in its own, so cool, and my friends and I can't wait to go into there if we're too tired after class to go into London. Then we had a free lunch at the pub, and I had a delicious veggie burger and a pint of fosters! I only drank half of the beer, also keeping my hydration in mind! I can't believe how smart I'm being! I even put on sunscreen! (lets see how long the smart and carefulness lasts!) Anyways, it was a delicious free lunch, with all types of CONDIMENTS! if anyone knows me, they know I love condiments, especially on my fries. So, i went over to the condiment section and there was so many things. I tried all of them of course. Here's a rundown.
French mustard: Looks a little like poop when you squeeze it out of the packet, because its brown, but it tastes like a velvety mustard that's not as spicy as guldens, just a little sweeter.
Horseradish sauce: everyone knows what that tastes like, but soo good on fries!
Malt vinegar- chips and vinegar! What can I say?
And last but not least, Ketchup! Enough with my condiment tangent. I had my fun. Anyway, we got into groups and left for London to do our "photo frenzy" which was getting together with our flatmates and taking pictures in front of various locations.

We got there from the Kingston station to Waterloo, which is the central London train station. We took a left immediatley and got to the London eye! So cool. Here is a picture, I took it, so I couldn't be in it. But from L to R is Jeremy, Amber, Jenna, Kirsten and James. They're all my roommates.

On the way toward the tube, we passed big ben! It's just as big as you thought it would ever be. It was just so crowded, it was hard to really enjoy the sights. Maybe we'll go in earlier next time.

Next, we "hopped on the tube" to Buckingham palace! It was so beautiful walking through the park, and then we finally got there. It was in the blaring sun in the middle of the day, and we figured we'd come back because we needed to get other places by 5:30 but we got there!!

We finished the day off by stopping in Trafalgar Square, it was so gorgeous, but again, so crowded and hot that it was somewhat unbearable and all I kept thinking about was water. So we left the area and went to the Jubilee Market just down the street. SO cool. so beautiful, all sorts of designer shops, little bakereys and ice cream shops, and pubs all over the place. It was so cool, on a cobblestone street. I can't believe I haven't been here before, the experience was indescribable. It is so beautiful, and unlike any city I've ever been in.

After that, we were getting antsy and hungry. So we went to a delicious Thai place, and my roommate from Montana had never eaten Thai before! it was so funny, she was nervous and didn't know what to get! We helped her pick something out and she loved it, it was a successful experience for her, and us, because it was very good.

At the end of the day all I wanted to do was get off my feet, but we were in the center of London and still had to catch the tube back to Waterloo, and a train from Waterloo to Surbiton (Which is the station about 10 minutes walk from our dorm) ughhh.. so much more walking. But we did it! And made it back to our rooms by about 7:30. It was a successful trip. Next time I go in, I want to have a more definite plan, and find some really cute coffee shops and book shops, and do things that are less- touristy. Can't wait for my next trip in.

Off to orientation

aaaannnd.. I feel like a prospective college freshman again. Wish me luck today, this is what it says we're doing (mom I know you'll love this) Enrollment, a walking tour of campus and Kingston town, lunch and then a trip to London in the afternoon" I'm really excited.

Well, I'm about to doust myself with sunscreen, put on my most comfortable flip-flops and be on my way, It's about 7:19 and I have to catch the bus at either 8:30, 8:45 or 9:10. I'm excited to get this day started, lets hope its not too hot out there! I'll write again later about the day when I get back!

li'al buggah

Okay, maybe I was a little harsh before on the ol' UK. I was completley distressed and in a state of what I'd say was emotional panic and the closest thing to me (my computer) was dying before my eyes with no chance of salvation because I had a French power adapter instead of a British one! I was kind of panicking, but right now, I'm feeling pretty good. We went to the market and I basically bought strictly breakfast food, since I figure I could eat eggs and cereal for each meal if I had to, and they are usually the easiest foods that don't perish. I also bought a pretty cool English beer for 2 pounds, it seemed pretty badass.
Anyway, I was miserable, having attempted to take a freezing cold shower, even though i was so hot my clothes were sticking to me like I had rolled around in super glue. But, now I'm better because I went to the store, bought an adapter and a fan, and also, put all my clothes away. I feel a lot more put together than I did. And I'm glad because if I had the chance before-- I probably would have headed right back down to the states.
I'm going to start taking pictures, mostly for Mum and Dad, because I know how much they want to see where I am at. Me and a few friends went down to a Pub called Victoria's and had a pint of beer and a salad, it was a half classy meal, and we watched tennis on the screen. It was lots of fun, we skipped out on the fish and chips that all the other kids were having, it was just too full of American kids from Kingston-- a little too cliche if you ask me. I'm sure we'll get fish and chips some other time. (Euughh.)
I also took a shower which was monumental for me in this long and tiresome day. It seemed like the only thing I couldn't have, and I didn't like that. As soon as I turned my "airplane" shower on, it was freezing cold. Then it FINALLY warmed up, and I took a lukewarm shower of my choice. It was refreshing and restored a lot more energy than I thought I had in me.
We walked about a half mile down the road and stopped at the pub. It was delightful. I think I'm going to quit while I'm ahead and go to bed within the next hour (it's 8:50 here). I think I deserve it.

"Seething Wells"

Well, right now, I'm living in a dorm called "seething wells" and let me tell you, I'm about as seething as the wells. I'm exhausted, the place is hotter than a donkey's ass, and I'm just expected to pick up and go on with my normal day when I hadn't gotten a wink of sleep. Right now on my computer it says the time is 11:55, and that is the schedule I'm on right now. Here, it's almost 5:00 pm. and I'm so confused. I missed the walking tour because my roommates woke me up two minutes before we could go, which was partly my fault because i was so tired i never set an alarm or even told them to wake me up. Either way, I'm exhausted, but that doesn't change the fact that I still need lots of things from the grocery store.
My bathroom smells a lot like poop, and I didn't even poop in there. So that leads me to think that its slowly backing up and it will leak other people's poop all over the room. I hope that doesn't happen. Maybe that's just me hoping for the worst. So far, this day has been torture, and I've felt extremely tired and dizzy all day (maybe that is because I didn't eat much yet)
On the bright side of things: I met some really cool people so far, and also the kids who work for KU are really nice, they are so helpful and when I went to them cause I was too tired to go on the walking tour, they showed me where it was going and told me where I could get food later. When I get my strength back a little (and when the sun isn't so blaring hot) I might go take the ten minute walk down there myself, and check it out.

"for beasts that meet me run away for fear"

That is a quote by Billy S, that stood out to me, in AMSND when Helena was comparing herself to her lovelier sister, Hermia. She says "No, I am ugly as a bear/ for beasts that meet me run away for fear." Sometimes I feel that way! But who doesn't, when we just roll out of bed, or refuse to shower for an entire day. Sometimes that happens. Anyway, it is the night before I go to London and I certainly do quake with fear. I've totally forgotten that I actually need to take a CLASS, and I'm going to need to buy school supplies tomorrow at CVS when I pick up my pictures. I also have to remember to go to Barnes and Noble and buy a cheap copy of Emma. Need some good Jane Austen to let me fall asleep on the plane. I'm nervous, but today I got an email telling me what the deal is with pickup and stuff, and I found out that there is a girl and a guy in my program from Jersey who are actually on my flight, which is pretty cool. I didn't think anyone would be on the flight with me.
I'm hoping this blog will serve as a sort of motivation to start me writing again. Perhaps the things I encounter there will make me want to write, and this i think is a good way of letting my friends and family know about my progress! I'm gonna give the link out to everyone, so whoever wants to save it, please do, I will update everyday at least once a day, in hopes that documenting my trip will make the memories last longer!

2 days and counting

I can't even believe in less than two days I will be on a plane to London. This is unbelievable and Jane Austen and Willy would be proud. I can't believe it. I hope I make friends, I hope I don't gain weight, I hope I remember to bring sheets, I hope I bring enough underwear. Oh man. This is tough. Hopefully I will be alright. Ah. Wow. I'm scared. Someone calm my nervesss...

Tonight, Rat Poison for Dinner

Armpits

New spice and grass, I can
shut my eyes and take it
in anywhere I go—
warm cloves on black fleece, set
deep into clothes I’ve worn
leaving your house when the
morning came in one gust—

One body. Stripped of mine
draped in yours. Buried my
head into your armpit

and breathed in hard. Sound foul?

Well armpits are secretly
lovely, you know. Where else can
an eager young lady
rest after reading Jane
Austen all day and sleep

like an illiterate
child? A perfect nook
for a fine slender neck—

to cradle the hopes and
deranged goals of a girl.

Biding in this space while
aspiring to be the
woman of her own dreams.

Rest In Peace

You taught me the story of Oedipus. And took me to see Romeo and Juliet for the first time. I leaned Othello by your hand. I learned I was funny, I learned I was confident, I learned I could sing in front of people and that joy comes from it. I learned I could memorize Shakespeare when you told me I only had 10 days to do it. I couldn't put down Death of a Salesman in your class. You gave me chances I know I will never have again in life. You gave me the dream that I know I'm destined to fulfill. You gave me the platform to be who I always wanted to be, but never had the courage. Now I know what I want to do with my life, before your encouragement, I never had a clue. I owe it to you that I'm happy where I am.

So I'm sitting here

Just relaxing. That's all. Thought I'd get some reading done. That's all. Thought I could surf the web, and maybe just hang out. JUST THOUGHT I MIGHT. PERHAPS

My Trip To Oklahoma

I woke up, feeling like I was going to fall over, and I hoped that when I did, it would be into some sort of ice cold sports drink pool because I was PARCHED. That's what happens when you drink whiskey "double donna's" that Andy Perez makes for you. I think that when you ask for low fat cream cheese, they just give you less on the actual bagel. Anyway, I drove Jay to get his car from the towing place. It was quite the experience. I get home and Ashley calls me saying there are beer cans all over outside and that our neighbors are going to call a cleanup crew to come and then bill us for it. I hop over the fence outside to find ONE beer bottle. One. A cleanup crew? Seriously? When Ash said "cleanup crew" I literally pictured four meatheaded guys in orange jumpsuits standing there with one of those sticker things and all poking at the ONE beer bottle on the ground.
"That will be one ollar please." The fat one would say to me when he was done.

So I pick it up, throw it out, make sure all the empty 30 pack boxes on OUR DECK are out of sight from the neighbors. Ridiculous. I get in the shower. Warm. Fun. And no one's home so I start singing. The first song that comes into my head? "Oh What A Beautiful Morning" from Oklahoma. So I'm singing "I've got a beautiful feeling, everything's goin' my way!" at the top of my lungs and I can't help but writhe in the irony. Vocal chords don't fail me now! The steam feels wonderful and the soap on my acid-burnt face feels so cleansing. And I can't help but think what the hell I'm going to write for my Art of Female Rebellion class.

Wop-wahhhh.

Just Submitted this to my campus literary magazine. A microfiction.

Panhandles

The stone counter seemed colder to the touch than she had ever imagined, and as she placed her forearms down on top of it, she felt her whole body fill with goose pimples. Her mother was washing the dinner dishes.

“I mean-- her legs, they were like… skeleton bones!” She couldn’t see her mother’s facial expression, but the way her soapy hand flew in the air signaled a vulnerability that couldn’t be masked. “She couldn’t even stand today. She doesn’t eat!” Standing up from the stool and walking to the sink, she cautiously approached her mother’s side. “I really don’t think you girls should see her anymore.” The clunky silver pan was deep, and full of suds. Her mother was almost elbow deep into their tepid, yet welcoming sponginess when tears started looping her cheeks. Still, she held tight onto both ends of the pan and sloshed the soapy water around from end to end, and dumped it out over and over again, until the suds had transformed to faint, clear water bubbles; until the white suds were almost all gone. Neither of them said anything.
The running water and the soft sobbing turned into a synchronized sound, a white noise that they were too tired to acknowledge. She waited for her mother to put down the pan and really let it out. But she kept rinsing and re-rinsing. The silence was long, draining all the sullied hope, the false assurances that her mother might have thought of in that day. She looked to the windowsill above the sink and thought, if her grandmother were doing the dishes, her golden rings would be stacked on top of each other right there, absorbing the cold from the wintery pane. She thought of how she might never see those rings sitting there again.

“Here,” She finally said, holding out the nearest dishcloth “ I’ll dry.”

Her mother placed the wet burden into her hands and stood, witnessing her daughter sweep the smooth silver top, gathering the many constellations of water droplets from each of the corners, the handles, and the bottom of the pan.

1-800-MISSING

So I woke up and my phone was gone. Nowhere to be found. I looked behind my head on my nightstand where I always keep it. Gone. I looked on the floor thinking maybe it fell off during a vigorous vibration. Not there. I looked under my covers, thinking perhaps I accidentally coddled the phone in a sudden stroke of loneliness. Wasn't there. I looked in my bathroom, thinking I made a midnight trip to the toilet/called somebody. You know, multitasking in my sleep. Not there. I ran up into Emma's room in a panic, and she said "Maybe it's in your car". I said, no no it just vanished I swear it. She said "Maybe its in the crack of your bed" I said I already looked there, and of course that was the first place I looked, and it's not there. I asked her to call it from her phone. I walked downstairs following the tinny vibrations and sure enough...

it was in the crack of my bed.

Thank you Emma, for always knowing what to do when I'm in a state of panic.

takin' care of admissions...

2 things:

1. When I was in quick check getting coffee... I heard Aerosmith's "Pink" which I haven't heard in absolutely forever. It made me think of my paper and Belinda, and how I want to do it on "the blush".

There is something very pleasing about folding acceptance letters. I feel like humming.

2. A man called me up before and asked me where to send his daughter's application fee. I told him 1 Normal Avenue, Montclair NJ. He said he should remember it because he went there. I jokingly replied "You went here! And you don't remember!?" He replied , "Well, nobody was normal in the 70's."Pure Gold.

Leaves fall through, dark green enough to be blue.

Listening to Wilco, and trying to blow dry my hair for the day.

When the days are so long, the way I experience them, I like to try to look nice.

Emphasis on try.

And I like to try to smell nice too.

Emphasis on smell.

And sometimes, if I'm feeling lucky, I like to even try to be nice.

Emphasis on be.

There are more of these that I could do, but we'll save them for when I don't have to run out of the door in ten minutes.

Here's my megaphone, but no one is listening.

A quote from a wonderfully smart yet incredibly-resembling-a-yeti fellow English Major:
"I'm afraid to be happy, because then what comes next?"